[This is an adaptation of an article I wrote in May 2005 for a nonprofit organization called AdvocateWeb, of which I am founder.]

I've been reflecting on ways we can positively impact the lives of people around us, and the ways I have been affected by acts of kindness from others. Some of life's most difficult problems don't have solutions. No matter how badly we might want this trial, this struggle, this illness, or this disease to no longer plague our lives, we often have no alternative other than to go through it.

What a tremendous difference it makes to go through such trials with someone else at our side. They may not have any answers. They may even feel helpless and not even fully comprehend the difference they are making at the time. One of the greatest gifts you can give someone going through a difficulty is simply "being there" for them. The amazing thing is that it is a gift where both the recipient and the giver are blessed.

If you have had someone in your life who has "been there" for you through your struggles, give them a special word of thanks. If you are feeling alone and feel that you have no one who has "been there" for you, I urge you to take heart. Try to be there for someone else. Show someone love in some unexpected way. Be a light in someone else's life. In shining the light, you illuminate the path for you both.

As I write this, I am sitting in a hospital room with my mother, who had surgery for cancer yesterday. I can't take away her pain. I can't take away her illness. But I can go through this by her side. She has been there for me. I am being there for her.

One of the greatest gifts you can give someone is the gift of your presence as they go through a difficult time, helping them realize they are not alone.   Even if you feel inadequate and have nothing to give, even if you also feel all alone, remember this.  If one person who is all alone, supports another person who is all alone, then neither is alone.

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Copyright: Please do not republish any of these writings without first obtaining my permission. (You may contact me by clicking on the Contact Kevin link).  All of my writings are Copyright (c) 2005 Kevin Gourley. All rights reserved.   Any reference to them should also reference the web page address as well.